Friday night, a friend and I were at one of the few bars in town with a decent beer selection. Now, I don’t have a problem with cheap beer - I’ll drink Yuengling or Miller Lite or Southpaw with the best of ‘em. However, when better choices are available, I’ll happily choose one of those.
So the waiter comes up to take our drink order, only it’s not just the waiter. He’s flanked on both sides by these girls in black mini skirts.
“What’ll you guys have?”
One of the girls chimes in, “You’ll have a Bud Light, right?”
My friend doesn’t drink alcohol, so he ordered a Coke and all the attention was on me. “C’mon. We’ll give you free stuff if you order a Bud Light.” They had Mardi Gras beads and other random useless crap.
Instead of launching into any number of scathing comments I could’ve made about Bud Light, I simply said “It gives me heartburn,” which is very true.
She was taken aback, but certainly she’d heard that one before. Just do a Google search for “Bud Light gives me heartburn” and you’ll see that I’m not alone. Still, she pressed the issue and I said “I’ll think about it.”
Then I ordered a Bass Ale, because I hadn’t had one in a long while. And now that I think about it, that should have satisfied her, since Bass comes from the same giant beer conglomeration that gives us Budweiser products.
